Then Jaimee decided we needed to go to Dixie's Crack and hike around, even though I was in heels and it was dark! :) It was an adventure for sure, I'm lucky I didn't die! There were times I thought for sure I was going to end up face first in the red sand, luckily I had some very chivalrous gentlemen looking out for me :)
Day 16
I thought when love for you died, I should die. It's dead. Alone, most strangely, I live on.
They say that time heals all wounds but all it's done so far is give me more time to think about how much I miss you.
To end this blog post I just want to say how hard getting over him has been, I know it isn't over by a long shot but I can't stop thinking about how things were supposed to be. How many little things you said that made me certain we were going to be getting married. That you would never let me leave, how you planned on having kids with me and things about the house we would buy. The thing I need to realize is you LIED about all of it, I had every ounce of my being convinced that you would go through with it and now I can't even talk to you. My best friend is gone, and you didn't even want to try to work on it. I guess I must have made you just dread our future together. I know all of this now and I still can't convince myself that you NOT coming back. I'm sure you are already over me and that sucks. I see all of your facebook posts and how busy and happy you are, and I wish I was there to share in your happy moments. But I can't be there because of your decision. Do you miss me? Do you wish you would have taken that leap? Or are you thrilled to be with your friends and drinking again? Is this what you want? I thought I was what you wanted..
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